In We Loved It All, Lydia Millet crafts a poignant narrative that is both a reflection on modern society and an intimate exploration of personal resilience and hope. As a new mother with a two-year-old daughter, I found this work profoundly resonant, capturing the anxieties and joys of parenthood in a world teetering on the brink of ecological and social upheaval. Right at the beginning of the book, Millet drew me in with her evocative imagery of the world – a paradise in the past. And when I read the words, “When you turn into a mother you lose the power of coldness,” I was hers right to the end of the book.

This memoir intertwines the lives of several characters, each grappling with their own challenges while collectively confronting the overarching theme of climate breakdown. Each is richly developed and deeply human, embodying different facets of our response to crisis. There’s the young mother, struggling to reconcile her fierce love for her child with the fear of an uncertain future – a sentiment that struck a particular chord with me. Her journey is one of cautious hope and resilience, reflecting the broader theme of the work: finding strength and beauty amidst chaos. Then there are the non-human beings on the planet, their quirks, their lives, and what they might have said if they could speak our language.

The narrative structure of Millet’s book mirrors the complexity of our times and the scattered mind of this toddler-mum (with no offence intended to the author). It doesn’t adhere to a linear chronology. Instead it flows through different periods and perspectives, much like the unpredictable currents of life itself. This approach also seems to have allowed Millet to explore a wide range of emotions and experiences – from the intimate moments of parental love to the broader existential threat of a planet in danger. It was perhaps for this reason that I was able to read the book at any time of the day and switch easily between its chapters and my various duties.

We Loved It All also excels in its examination of relationships. The bonds between parents and children, partners, and even strangers, are portrayed with a raw honesty that is both heart-warming and heartbreaking. Millet captures the complexity of love in its many forms, emphasising that it is often through our connections with others that we find the strength to face adversity. The book’s title suggests a bittersweet acknowledgement of the beauty and fragility of life as we know it.

In one of the most powerful sections, Millet draws a parallel between the nurturing of a child and the nurturing of the Earth. This analogy resonates deeply, especially in the context of my own life. The sense of responsibility and care that comes with motherhood is akin to the urgent need to care for our planet. Millet doesn’t offer easy solutions, but rather invites readers to reflect on their own roles in this ongoing narrative.

What I appreciate most about Millet’s writing is her ability to convey a sense of cautious optimism. Despite the grim realities depicted, there is an underlying thread of hope – a belief that change is possible and that the human spirit is resilient. This is a message that feels particularly important in today’s world, where many of us are struggling with similar fears and uncertainties. This is a profound and moving exploration of contemporary life, motherhood, and the environmental crises that define our era. Millet’s engaging storytelling and powerful prose make this a must-read book for anyone trying to understand the complexities of our times.

We Loved It All: A Memory of Life by Lydia Millet. WW Norton & Co, 2024. ISBN: 9781324073659

Rashi Goel is a freelance writer based in Goa, India. She writes about the environment, health, wellness and, most recently, parenting. You can find her on Instagram @rashicreates